The Pavo News is a bit confused. We were led to believe the Florida voting fiasco of 2000 was a Republican conspiracy, but recent events in the Sunshine State seem to contradict this account. Following a $30 million voting machine upgrade, Miami-Dade and Broward counties have once again led the charge of total incompetence. Much to their chagrin, the South Florida Democratic Elections Committee had no Republicans, pregnant or hanging chad to fault.

   Certainly something is amiss in South Florida, but the Pavo News would never suggest deliberate sabotage, tampering or voter fraud! We do suggest two possible solutions: First, allow the primary election to proceed unimpeded. Once the people have chosen thier candidate, wait until the deadline for candidate replacement has passed, determine the probability of victory and, should the nominee lack voter support, entice the elected candidate to step down and replace him or her with a more tenable substitute. Sure, this may violate the Voters Rights Act and several state laws, but a quick strategic consultation with the New Jersey Democratic Committee will aid in ironing out all the vexing legal details.

   Secondly, we suggest a trip to Baghdad. Once there, Florida Democrats can learn first hand how to run a proper election. With an illiteracy rate over 60 percent, the Iraqi people recently managed to complete a presidential election in which 100 percent of the votes were accounted for and the electorate experienced no difficulty determining for which candidate they were casting a vote.